• Mental health,  My weekly thought,  Parenting

    The Glad Game

    Earlier this week Nick and I were sitting down to dinner when he asked me this question: ‘What do you look forward to?’ He wasn’t asking me about the big things like holidays, house extensions or our future life plans. He meant the little things. Nick looks forward to a lot. Strangely he is a person who looks forward to his job, he looks forward to solving the problems that his clients send him, he enjoys working on his own projects at home, he relishes his morning commute when the city is quieter and he can indulge in podcasts and music, all the while getting lost in his own thoughts.…

  • My weekly thought,  Parenting

    I miss my boy

    Rufus is less than a month from turning 6 and in the last few months he has most definitely turned from being my baby boy into a fully fledged little boy. He’s gone from being cuddly and snuggly to wanting to have time to himself. He’s gone from playing with toys to playing with computer games and he’s gone from asking sweet questions like ‘if Australia is at the bottom, are Australians upside down?’ to talking non-stop about Minecraft and a whole game world I know nothing about. While I am so proud of the little man he is becoming and am constantly amazed by all that he is learning,…

  • My weekly thought,  Parenting

    Learning about my son

    Just over six weeks ago Rufus started Year 1. Reception had been a bit hit and miss with him. Some things he had loved, learning to write, starting to read and his wonderful teachers, Miss Groves and Miss Prosper. However he really struggled with anxiety throughout the whole year. He was anxious about social situations, anxious about choosing the right things to do and generally staying out of trouble. He was a ball of nervous energy for most of the year and convincing him to go to school each morning became increasingly difficult. As you can imagine, when Year 1 loomed ever closer I too became anxious about how he…

  • General,  My weekly thought,  Parenting

    A change in attitude

    I am now one month from my due date (23/10/2018) and it would be foolish to think that I would be able to get through this month without feeling nervous, scared, upset and panicky. There are also other emotions that I can expect too and I think they’re ones I have neglected throughout this pregnancy so far. I feel excitement, joy, eager anticipation and the all important overwhelming need to nest. After experiencing the trauma of my birth with Eloise I entered into this pregnancy with quite a high level of anxiety and an expectation that it would be extremely emotionally draining. I think I was so aware of this…

  • My weekly thought,  Parenting

    What’s so scary?

    I have now been through two very different child births. My first was long, exhausting, painful and yet it was peaceful. I felt calm throughout and the hours after the birth were full of cuddles, dozing and feelings of pure joy. My second experience was very different. Natural labour didn’t start after the initial induction and breaking of my waters, so a hormone was used to get things moving. This ensured that my labour was more painful, more intense and didn’t allow my own natural hormones lead the situation. After the birth things got worse with a loss of blood, shock and the realisation that Eloise was unwell and needed…

  • My weekly thought,  Parenting

    What’s in a name?

    Today I had a hospital appointment, something I’ve had a lot of lately, and when I checked in at reception I straight away said that my name was Jennifer Koronka. I usually automatically say Jennie and then correct myself just in case the receptionist can for some reason not infer that Jennie may also be Jennifer. Anyway, today I bypassed that whole stage. I, for possibly the first time in my life, introduced myself as Jennifer. I’m going to put this strange behaviour down to the fact that I have had a UTI for three weeks (now tested positive for GBS – I’ll talk about that in another blog) and…

  • My weekly thought,  Parenting

    A Good Day

    Sometimes when you’re a parent of young, crazy kids, married with a house to run, a wild cat running around and you’re pregnant with a third baby, it can feel like you never actually enjoy yourself. You always feel like you’re on some kind of treadmill or hamster wheel. Working hard to keep everything going and never stopping to actually appreciate it all. This past weekend Nick and I decided to slow down. He had had a really stressful week at work and I had been feeling quite wrung out so the weekend was marked out as a chance to just enjoy ourselves. We weren’t going to do housework, DIY…

  • Parenting

    The boy who thought too much?

    Rufus is 5 years old and he is more grown up than most 30 year olds I know. He’s witty, sweet and astonishingly in touch with his emotions. Just the other day Eloise was given a magazine by somebody and Rufus came over to me and honestly said ‘mummy, I feel a little jealous.’ What 5 year old recognises that emotion and can express it so easily? He’s always been like it though and has always liked us to define words that help describe his emotions. He would tell us that he was cross instead of having tantrums, he would put his arm around me when I was sad without…

  • My weekly thought,  Parenting

    Let’s get some perspective

    I’ve spoken a little about this topic before on my Youtube channel but this is the first time I’ve actually addressed it in writing. On my ‘About’ page I make a promise. I make a promise to be honest, open and transparent. I will not sugar coat my life but equally I will not overly dwell on the harder times. I want to give a measured and realistic impression of what my life is like. To begin with I have to say that I am a very lucky lady. I have two parents who are completely supportive and who have given me confidence, thoughtfulness, intelligence and independence. I also have…

  • Parenting

    Graduating Reception

    In a few weeks time I will be attending Rufus’s Reception Graduation ceremony. First let me say that I think a Graduation ceremony for Reception is ridiculous but this is the Instagram world we live in so count me in. The last year of Rufus starting school has been quite a ride. We’ve had the ups of making new friends (one of whom he is planning to marry one day), learningto read, learning to write and generally having the world open up for him. I have always been determined that I would not ‘teach’ my children but that I would aid their desire to learn. This sounds extremely hippy dippy…